Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
