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  • 73 60
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 22, 09 at 7:35pm

    my girl gets me presents and i don't think she's trying to get oral out of it.

  • 71 60
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 22, 09 at 5:15pm

    Why did this get posted?? Not funny.

  • 66 55
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 22, 09 at 5:11pm

    move back in with your mom.

  • 72 69
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 22, 09 at 11:37pm

    I wish they did this for dorms, too... The university should invest.

  • 70 65
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 22, 09 at 5:14pm

    I was gonna say get a girlfriend, but thats more expensive than hiring room service

  • 69 64
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 22, 09 at 5:28pm

    5:17 means 5:11 and 5:14.

  • 66 60
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 22, 09 at 6:07pm

    Girl suck cock= boys fucking bitch Girl no suck cock= flowers, bears, and dinners till cock gets sucked!

  • 65 60
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 23, 09 at 2:28am

    Yeah I wish ppl would just pay for my meals. Please grow up!!

  • 60 54
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 4, 10 at 2:20am

    It's called a wife.

  • 62 61
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 23, 09 at 11:26am

    my girl would punch me if i tried that - "here's a bear that says i love you beary much. now blow me" only feeble girls like teddy bears

  • 58 54
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 22, 09 at 7:06pm

    A blow job you have to buy is a blow job you couldn't earn.

  • 62 64
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 22, 09 at 5:17pm

    Jesus, even why guys grow up they still expect someone to take care of them.

  • 62 67
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 22, 09 at 11:13pm

    WTF...that was the so stupid and retarded...fuck whoever thought that was funny!!!

  • 57 58
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 22, 09 at 5:51pm

    Like girls really want you to buy them flowers and stuffed animals.

  • 61 70
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 22, 09 at 6:44pm

    It's cool if you want to buy me an actual plant. I had a boy who bought me potted strawberries for my apartment once, that was pretty cool. But flowers die in a couple days and stuffed animals I grew out of at five. Put some thought into your romantic gestures.

  • 60 70
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 23, 09 at 12:36pm

    Mine does!!! I just order food then drop kick the delivery guy down the stairs.

  • 51 54
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 4, 10 at 2:22am

    It's called a wife. But they are expensive....and sometimes mean.

  • 54 60
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 22, 09 at 9:23pm

    8:37, everyone thinks their own submissions are hilarious, and this site is full of texts like this one that aren't. Maybe yours are just as bad.

  • 53 60
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 24, 09 at 3:32pm

    you can its called being in a relationship

  • 57 71
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 22, 09 at 5:32pm

    It's funny because he is refering to his dumb bitch girlfriend as room service. And he has to pay for it by buying her shit!

  • 53 64
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 22, 09 at 8:37pm

    what the fuck... i send in hilarious texts and they get rejected, this is one of the most unfunny things ive ever seen and it gets accepted. fuck textsfromlastnight

  • 52 71
    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 22, 09 at 6:47pm

    It's not romantic perse, merely minor expenses to get a blow job and having a girl think she's special. Yes I do mean special as in retarded!