therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
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