There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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