the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
