Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
