this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
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Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
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So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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