Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
