i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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