her vagine was all disorganized.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
