I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Randomize
