i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
