awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Be still, my beating vagina.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
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