he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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