Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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