he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize