i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize
