I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
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