Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Randomize
