i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
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