He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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