the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize