Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
