The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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