I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
