At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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