I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
How does one acquire holy water?
Ladies don't puke and tell
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
