I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
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