I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
It's rum buckets o'clock
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
