this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
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I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
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I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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