so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
