its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Randomize