i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
i out mim tonsoeep
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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