ugly people sure do ruin things
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I'm determined to sit on that face.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
