Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
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