Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
