I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I touched a dick in church today
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Randomize
