guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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