Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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