I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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