so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize