u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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