went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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