there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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