Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Randomize