just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
