i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Randomize
