didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize