I must be too annoying 4 u.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
