You're my little dorito
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
