Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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